Anaesthesia (2013)

by Luis Mojica

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about

"Anaesthesia" is the debut album by the American composer, pianist and song writer Luis Mojica. Short of resources, the entire album was performed, recorded, sung, composed, and produced by Luis himself. The result is a one man, schizophrenic theatre piece that chants, sings, screams, cries, and moans its way through ten songs that tell a very complex story about rejecting the feminine. "Anaesthesia" comes together like a sonic collage, incorporating everything from Jazz, R&B, and Baroque styles of music. Some songs span over fourteen minutes, never repeating themselves lyrically, and organically change shape and size throughout the piece. Other songs use Luis' wide vocal range to create choral-like vocal harmonies that are, sometimes, only used for a mere four words in a sea of, otherwise, solo vocal expression. Luis himself describes the album as "something that I had stumbled upon and sworn my dedication to until it was completely uncovered and restored like some beautiful, unrealized antique furniture growing dust in the attic of my heart." The album surely bears truth to the artist's statement. It is timeless, intimate, intense, completely unique, and a stark, refreshing difference in comparison to today's music.

credits

released November 20, 2013

Written, performed, recorded, & mixed by Luis Mojica.
Mastered by Todd Levine at Magnetic North Studios in Saugerties, NY.

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Luis Mojica Woodstock, New York

Documenting the bizarre, beautiful human experience via music.

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Track Name: Two Blue Angels
Walking down the street,
We were talking to a friend,
When you came barging in,
Waiting to begin.

Twin spirits by birth,
Twin spirits by name,
One spirit thrives while the other is cursed,
Into a body built like an urn.

Two blue angels framed,
Two blue angels came,
Singing songs of deep healing,
Singing "Happy Birthday".

To who?
"You!"

No time to tell,
No time to swell,
Because time blows by the window,
And I know what you know.
Track Name: Persephone
I heard about the fires, little girl,
I saw your tire tracks in the snow,
You came back with the smell of flames,
I said "Hey, where do those tire tracks go?".

They go away from my patient sea,
Where I will forever roam,
You'd rather been beneath the Earth's dead, dry leaves,
Where the grown men can take you back home.

Those men with fake piano hands,
Those men with skin so pale,
Those men who worship the one man you could have loved,
But the first one you just had to fail.

She walks with the dead,
The dead open her heart,
So don't give her your hand,
Unless you love the dark.

She's harvesting roses to keep her heart open,
When all she must do is fall into his ocean.

She opens her hand and the land is reborn,
Her heart is a forest grown wild from his storm,
Each fire bolt exposes her dark parts and heals them,
She must choose to fall into cold clay or ocean.

It isn't hard to learn how to swim in the sea,
Her humble breast will keep you afloat,
You could have learned all of its mysteries with me,
But your reflection is all you wanted to know.

I heard about the fires, little girl,
That you were setting off inside your womb!
I heard about the fires, little girl,
And I guess some girls just can't leave home too soon.

She closes her hand and the land turns to dust,
She's opened your fist and your heart has turned from lust,
To love.

And then she has gone to the underworld,
And you are left here alone,
A goddess flirting in the underworld,
And you are a human,
Alone.
Track Name: Corner Store
He took a cab over to Essex Street to make love in a car in the rain,
He took a cab over to Christopher Street just to look at all of the queens,
He took a cab uptown to meet the man of his dreams,
A plastic prophet for men born into androgyny.

He took a cab back home to rest his head and lie down,
The plastic prophet made a promise he would turn him inside out,
The plastic prophet did a dance and moon man slipped ten grand in his hand,
He said "Just sign the papers, boy,
And I will make you a man".

He sent the form then he celebrated at the corner store,
It sounded like rain.

Do you know how dark his childhood was?
He could not attain a record of his name.

I don't know you but I'd like to tear you apart and love you in the dark.

Two blue angels came,
Told me his real name.

They said: "I don't know you, but I would love to tear you apart and love you in the dark".

Two blue angels came and told him his real name!

He bared his body in the long mirror,
Then he went walking down the corridor,
His threadbare gown beneath electric lights,
Exposed the prophet's perforated lines.

The room was white and smelled like rubber bands,
The prophet held his flesh with rubber hands,
Then as he sincerely inserted the blade,
The one blue angel up and flew away.

Singing over his nude body,
A song to heal the body.

Hey ah,
Hey ah,
Ohm.
Track Name: Torture
They tortured the sand,
With pictures of Jesus,
We talked to the clouds,
Until they fell down,
Fell down they did,
Spilled all over our rain sticks,
Fell down like the cock of a grandfather clock,
We stood right up like a jack-in-the-box.

A true American,
Walks barefoot on the land,
And never allows their Father,
To disembowel their Mother,
They talk to the land,
And with her, they walk hand in hand,
They never follow laws written by men,
They only dance to the land's own rhythms.

To reclaim our Mother,
We exorcize our Father,
To save her from renovation,
To prove loyalty to our nation,
We knew right then that we were good Americans,
When we dig our toes into the dirt and spoke with our ancestors.

Hey ah,
Hey ah,
Hey ah,
Hey ah,
Hey!

I shall keep my promise true,
We won't dare to forget you.
Track Name: Diana
I love the way you fell into my heart with such a thud,
I love the way you walk on through my mind,
You always take off both of your shoes,
You're not afraid of getting lost.

I love the way your body perfectly fits mine.

The phone rang and I fell down,
We've sacrificed the landline,
For a mechanical wind chime.

My heart is still frozen,
Will you come back and warm it?
You who is so beloved,
Yet still uninvited.

I'm sorry!

You came to me in a dream,
There is no safety in sleep!
My haunted heart knew without a doubt,
That I could never live without you.

And so it goes,
I loved you,
I lost you,
The moment I kissed her neck.

I had loved a folded rose beneath the mother moon,
That twilight speckled silver light under which roses bloom,
I thought you were immune for in your hand there lay crushed blooms,
With a notion that this potion would eclipse that full grown moon.

I had indulged you entirely,
And stored all of my faith into those bitter, bristly seeds,
That mildewed tumbleweed that couldn't even lure a bee,
Had broke its vow to thee that it would surely intervene.

We both had to confess this place too unfit to receive,
The mother was banished and the crone stricken with grief,
The green man turned to stone and the maiden, alone, could not keep,
Her heart from turning hollow where her yearning echoed with no mercy.

At my hearth stands a candle muffled by its own, old wax,
At your hearth lies a pile of cedar wood steeped in water,
In her heart, had it sparked, would have burned an all igniting fire.

I'm opening the old spark screen,
I'm growing old of sorrow,
So I take to cleaning,
Always dusting around the bellow.

For you, in sleep, I will wait!

You came into my dream,
A two foot doll all bound up in gauze,
You were removed from your divine tomb,
So I could free my heart of its rue,
I unwrapped you out of your papoose,
I sobbed all over you.

Your picture,
In my heart,
Your picture,
In my mind,
Your picture in my heart,
Forever in my mind.

Curly hair like me,
But since life had left your body,
It turned stark white,
I kissed your native cheeks,
Then you blinked emerald green,
You had your mother's eyes.

Two skinny legs like branches soon to break,
Letters on your arms,
"Dear Ma,
Dear Pa,
Where are your beloved arms?"

I lay my salty, salty face down on your womb,
I cry life back into your empty shell-like cocoon,
I tell you that you are beautiful,
Then your mouth opens,
And your belly is full.

Then up and goes that divine butterfly,
And I am called back to the world of the living,
And I lay on my back and stare at your warm body breathing,
I lay on my back and stare at the stain on our ceiling.

I have hope,
In your name I pray,
I have hope to see you some day.

Did you have red hair?
Does that expose this story?
If they never kissed my red beard,
Then this is just another song of glory.
Track Name: Polaroids
They all ran away,
From the light of the morning,
Into a cool shade,
They were given no warning.

Their pale skin turned green,
They were turned into stories,
For the moonlight of the evening,
Was their only saving grace.

How can I forgive these crimes at home?
If I can't forgive the broken bones?

Of children
Of libraries,
Of banks,
Of beautiful cities,
Grown from the bones,
Of Children.

When young men who were once born tame,
Are killing children in my name,
I can only pray for a miracle.

Still, the lie abounds for those who believe,
That money sent will create peace,
They can't turn our paychecks into miracles!

Oh no!
You must not chant their long song of hope!
A vulture hides inside that dove!

The miracle is love.
Track Name: Moon Man
"Kiss the man in the looking glass."

I can't bear to see her face,
You must take her away,
I am just a fabrication,
Not a man,
Nothing more than a mannequin,
Wishing to plant some human feet.

Our Father,
Who art up in space,
Once moon man gets there,
He will ask for his real name.

And you shall sing it to every star,
And the ancestors will chant,
Celebrating the day when you became a man.

I may never see you again,
Once my chest is broken open,
And the excess carefully taken,
And placed into the care of rubber hands.

A song is sung from the once imprisoned,
A song is sung to heal the newborn man.

I will allow this invocation,
To heal the pain that nature's creation,
Had lovingly bestowed upon me.

Our Father,
Take this scaffold off of me,
Expose,
The human man there underneath.

"Listen closely, my son,
Once you bid farewell to the woman,
Your skin will shed anew,
Then I'll release her away from you".

So long!

I don't care to know about the radio show where nothing is what it seems!
You won't find me walking up that new street they're chalking up for neo-American dreams!

We live inside the crack,
Of this old bell that seems to lack,
The symphonies of freedom,
We came down from the stars,
We worship only nature's laws,
We worship freedom.

Our Mother,
I invoke her.
Track Name: Woman Untold
"My chest was carved to look like his,
My body; a broken globe,
I have come to tell the world,
I am a woman untold."

Do you know what it's like?
To be born without a face?
To never know your name?
Do you know what it's like?

Give us a name!

Happy Birthday,
To who?

"I don't know what you've been shown,
But I've been here all along
He stole my bones then wore a cloak,
To harbor my warm heart."

"My long brown hair hung over his bones,
My green eyes laid in his skull,
All who think they know him well,
Don't know him at all."

"They don't know how you hated me
And hid me out of shame,
They don't know how he banished me,
Or how you set me free."

"I came alive while you laid there sleeping,
I thought to myself "Is this all I've been missing?",
A white room,
With you,
You were lying in some man's arms,
Performing my execution."

I lay with open arms,
Like some crucifixion,
Then you up and flew,
You were singing a song of healing.

"I up and flew,
I sang a song for you,
Over your nude body,
A song to heal your body,
Hey ah,
Ohm"

"Your chest was carved to set me free,
So I could visit the land,
Where ancestors with bird feathers,
Extend their boney hands."

"And take me to the river side,
At the city's edge,
Where an empty jar floats beneath the stars
With a letter for you that says."

If you can't love your baby girl,
Then tell me who can you love?
Go kiss the man in the looking glass,
Then send him off with love.

Go read what Ramakrishna wrote,
For all of those who must grow up,
In a man's bones with a women's soul,
Carry a wisdom of their own.

You have now become a man,
It's time for you to go on,
For you have come to tell the world,
Of another woman untold."

Do you know what it's like,
To store your heart away?
Or keep it for one day?
But only for one day.

Do you know what it's like,
To face this swelling pain?
To call my heart from the bay?
And ask it to stay.

Bring me its name!

"Happy Birthday to you".

You said "Let us call the water spirits in by the river,
We have a glass jar for an anchor",
We said we'd let the water take this back,
Let the water wash away our forlorn anger,
Let the water wash away my bad dreams of her,
Let the water wash away my good dreams of her,
We said that the water would be a bed for the martyr,
We said the life giving river would heal us of our death,
At once and forever.

Hand in hand,
We walked not proud,
Down sharp, wet rocks,
We drew a crowd,
To the filthy riverside where we released her.

In my palm was wrapped a spell,
An open jar of blood you held,
That holy, sacred, cursed full moon elixir!

That rusty drink we shall not welcome,
Was poured upon the spell in my palm,
Then cast into that emptied jar,
To sink beneath that salted swamp.

While we sullenly looked upon,
The gasping breath of that wide mouthed jar,
In the unforgiving solvent water,
That precious child became our martyr.

This river has seen its share of lovers,
Broken boats and bloated cardboard,
But never have these ancient waters,
Beheld such an innocent martyr.

I call upon our ancestors,
To shake our hearts from this wounded hurt,
To go and find our relinquished treasure,
And tell them that we love him or her.

"I found your namesake,
I'm sorry it took so long,
His body was safe and warm,
At the bottom of the river."

"His name is Diana,
Congratulations, it's a girl,
Happy Birthday, Dear Diana,
Your Mommy and Daddy still love you,
Just the way you are,
At the bottom of the river".
Track Name: Heartbeat
I swim across the ocean because there is no need to walk,
I want to fall into the ocean so that it can wash me clean,
Wash off the dust from all those filthy corners missed by the broom,
And from the broken grandfather clock,
That never gave my poor father's heart,
A tempo to follow in the dark,
A metronome for my growing heart,
To simply remember.

A crystalline potion,
Of Earth and hand picked roses,
All gathered with perfect love,
And sent with perfect trust to my heart,
With a love that lives not only in the dark,
With a love that shall not tear me apart,
Is dropped into mouth,
From the one I love,
For the one she loves,
And in that sea of roses,
The sky goes on forever,
My heart begins to open,
And I start to remember.

All of the forgotten wisdom,
Of my ancient family's war drums,
Of feather painted men,
Of long, flat breasted women,
Those men who only know their mothers,
Will then grow to look for their fathers,
Beneath the skin of some man's covers,
Or they will only take a lover,
If she can treat him like his mother,
Still he can grow to love his father,
But only if his father unfolds,
The sacred cloth that bounds the song that is told,
To growing hearts of men who follow its tempo,
And simply remember.

She carried a glass lantern and an old corn broom,
To wash off the dust,
Of antique treasures,
Of his whole lifetime,
Of antique devils,
Of his old hearth,
Of tall, broken candles,
A river of old wax.

Still, she kept on ahead,
Through all of the rubble,
Until she found the child,
Hiding in the corner,
Drowning in the mountainous shirt of a grown man,
She took him by the hand,
Led him to the water,
Held him under,
And he was born again,
He was born a man.